A Letter From An Irate Reader

36385_1524545157492_4404602_aTo: bane@savrasbane.com

From: [email withheld]

Subject: Re: Your website and shit


I am writing to tell you about what I think your site is about. I think your site is nothing but a venue for your own self-aggrandizement and a place for you to indulge in your narcissism. Your attempts at trying to throw your problems into the world’s stage is really pathetic. That’s all I really wanted to say.”

[Name withheld]

Well, having read this, of course my first reaction when dealing with any hater is, “Well, fuck this guy.” Then I mock them for a few minutes and forget about them, much like their parents did, except when I do it there’s no sodomy or the assurance that they’re my special little girl/boy to prevent them from calling the cops. However, I’d like to address this email, as poorly written and misspelled as it was. Seriously, it was in all caps and my spell-check almost shit itself and killed a kitten. It was that bad.

But, I think there are some points that I get fairly often that I would like to at least put my side on about.

First, a venue for my own self-aggrandizement. Guilty as charged. In the sense that every single website is for the owner’s/operator’s self-aggrandizement. So yeah, there’s that.

Second, my attempts to throw my problems onto the world’s stage.  THAT’S fuckin’ funny. Granted, my readership has grown a bit in past months, but it is by no means a “world’s stage”. It’s barely a regional stage. No one is holding a gun to your head to make you come here. Don’t come here. Something tells me that my website could do with a few less faceless dickheads reading it. Yourself, for example.

And I’m hardly throwing JUST my problems out there. I’m throwing EVERYTHING out there. The good and bad. My triumphs and my mistakes. If anything, I’m trying to find some kind of meaning to all of this, and my hopes in publishing this online is that someone else may either find their meaning within my ramblings, or have something productive to say that might make sense of my bullshit.

Clearly, you don’t want to take part, so I’ve banned your IP and sent you this article in an email reply. You know, because I know it will piss you off. Granted, you’ll have to either go to a proxy or something to view the site again, and I enjoy putting petty little morons like you through little problems designed to annoy you. So thanks for your input, cocksucker. But I think I can muddle my way through this quagmire by myself without some jaded, poorly schooled fucknut putting their two cents in from their mother’s basement.

So, I think we’ve covered it. I was actually going to write today about trying to find meaning in one’s actions and thoughts, but I suppose a pwnage email response will have to do for my almost daily blog post.

Cheers dickhead,



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