No Gun Reform? I’ll Hold My Shock…

So after Wednesday’s failure to pass a reform on gun control, one would think I would be angry as fuck and going to bitch about it here. Well, I am going to bitch about it, but I’m not really angry so much as I am un-surprised.

This is what happens when money changes hands in our nations capital. I do however, have a few things to say about the Senate’s failure, as I’ve never really codified my thoughts on gun control, except in a few heated Facebook threads. Meh, whatever. I wasn’t trying to “win” a debate or conversation so much as express my outrage. I really don’t give a shit what anyone else’s opinions are about gun control, because everyone generally comes from one of 4 camps.

1. The “Freedoms”: These are people who insist that their right to own a weapon capable of killing a lot of people trumps my safety concerns, should their “often” fragile psyche snap in half. These are people who think that EVERY weapon should be available to them in the event that the Russians come for them, and are usually stockpiling said weapons. They consider enforcement of the current laws useless and more regulation even more useless. You never even get a chance to reason with them, because they’re all “2nd Amendment hurr durr…”

Whatever. Only half of this group are morons who shouldn’t be trusted with anything sharper than a bowling ball, and those morons will eat a bullet from their own weapons anyway, so no worries. Most of them are Conservative Republicans who have no basis in reality. Some of them are even preparing for the zombie apocalypse and see “The Walking Dead” as an omen for the future.

[sarcasm]Yes, I’m quite safe with these people owning weapons.[/sarcasm] These people should be corralled for the safety of others in a square state with 20 foot high bulletproof glass surrounding it. Add all the guns they can stand and let them kill each other off.

2. “The Die-Hard Liberals”: These are people for whom the idea of guns offends them. These are picket line constituents who really only want the ability to complain about something. I won’t waste too much time on these morons, because usually listening to them gives me a brain freeze. Which is funny because I used to kind of identify with Liberals on some level. I still use liberal (or progressive) to describe my world views, though in this case I find their views abhorrent and stupid.

3. The “Pseudo-Intellectual Gun Wielders”: This is more of a subset of the first group that has a career and some kind of notoriety. Sadly, all the career and notoriety does is poorly mask their bigotry and ignorance about reality. You will find people fooled by this act usually watching Fox News.

4. The “Realists”: This is were I come in. Realists realize that weapons, while abhorrent, are necessary to protect yourself. They realize the need for regulation and enforcement of those regulations. They realize that education and licensing are necessary when owning and operating a machine whose purpose is to kill and maim a human being with a minimum of effort.

Now here is the reality of the situation.

“Gun regulations won’t stop guns from getting into the hands of criminals”

True, but it will slow it down. Only ENFORCEMENT of those regulations will stop it. Like namely, not giving a license to a woman with a son who was diagnosed with massive depressive issues. If you are seeking a license to own a weapon, you should have EVERY aspect of the past 10 years of your life examined by a governing body. If you are known to consort with felons, you don’t get a gun. If you have documented anger issues, you don’t get a gun. I could go on, but suffice it to say these regulations would work if the ATF were better funded and regulation allowed to take effect.

If you oppose measures designed to make people safer while sacrificing NONE of your civil liberties, then you have no right to complain when one of your family members is gunned down by some retard with a handgun. Regardless of it was stolen from their father who doesn’t feel it was his obligation to keep it locked up out of his kid’s reach. You have no right to give a shit about Aurora  Columbine, Newtown, or anything else. Because YOU could have prevented these.

I’ll be honest, I resent the fact that I have to own a weapon. I don’t like the idea of having to protect myself against a bunch of lunatics who couldn’t give any less of a shit about their lives, and as such give even LESS of a shit about mine. I resent that I can hold the ability to easily kill a human being, in the palm of my hand. This is a power that NO human being should have. I hate weapons, but I realize their necessity.

I also realize that if you have a distorted view of reality, you should NOT own a gun.

For example, I have a buddy of mine, we call him Bircky. Amazing guy. He owns a few weapons and is really into guns in a big way. But, he is responsible. He is the gun owner that can stock up to his heart’s content and it doesn’t matter at all to me. He is highly educated when it comes to weaponry and even machines some of his own weapons. He loves the idea of the weapon as a machine (and there is some beauty to a few pounds of nicely machined cold steel), but would not take a life unless he had no other choice.


If you can realistically pass a rigorous background check, in my eyes, you are worthy of carrying and owning a weapon. If you’re not, stay the fuck away from me.

“If guns are outlawed, only outlaws will have guns.” Yeah, whatever. As someone without my head up my ass, I don’t need to make that distinction. Regulation won’t fuck with your freedom to own a weapon, unless you’re a criminal or batshit crazy. And if you are either of those…


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